I started cooking by watching my momma cook and she learned by watching my Granny. I come from a deeply southern family so we are no strangers to butter, bacon grease, and cast iron. We love a fresh biscuit to sop our gravy and wouldn't think of throwing a ham hock away. So when I started watching the Food Network, I recognized a Southern sister by the way she said, "Ya'll" and put butter in nearly every dish she cooked. There's also something else about us Southern girls... We show our love by feeding others... which SHE DID. Then one day I saw her on some talk show. She was on her front porch in her rocking chair petting a chicken that was in her lap. A CHICKEN. She told the story of how she got her chickens from a rescue and how they used to be mistreated. She just loved sitting in her chair rocking her chickens. I wanted so badly to drive to her house in Savannah and rock chickens with her. I have since made it a life goal to have a hen house one day. You've read my blogs... I may get clawed to death or end up an "ALMOST chicken rocker" but I will die trying to rock my chickens! Now, maybe, you understand how my love for Paula Deen began.
Okay... It's confession time. US Weekly is my Den of Iniquity. Well... it's one of them. I don't know how I am so against gossip but I exclude the "stars" from the term "gossip". (Talk about an "AHA" moment.) Anyway, I clicked on my daily US Weekly update and I saw Paula's name and "RACIST" beside it! She's one of my mothers so I had to read, and read, and read. The more I read, the angrier I became. I was furious at her. I called Bo and told him I would not be buying anymore of her things and I would not be watching her shows because she was a RACIST! How could she?? I continued to tell him how disgusted I was and went on to point out that Jesus was not Caucasian. He was of Middle Eastern descent. I mean, did she hate Arabs, too? I even told him she needed a real life "come to Jesus" meeting. Oh man, I was so mad at her! I could not believe she said such ugly things and believe me, Bo wasn't the only one I spoke to about it. Nope. I ended up calling a few of my friends and family members and let them know EXACTLY how I felt.
I sat in my anger for a few days until it hit me. I was using Jesus... MY LORD AND SAVIOR'S NAME... to cut down Paula Deen and to justify my sanctimonious and self- righteous behavior. OUCH. Who am I to judge her? I am called to be a living well to pour out onto others and to show people what Jesus looks like by my actions and my words. How often have I been standing in my anger, my bitterness, or my hurt in Jesus' name in the past? Oh how my feelings are so hurt that I have misrepresented my precious Father in this way. As I type this, the tears are wetting my cheeks. He has forgiven me countless times of so many things and has washed me clean each and every time I have asked. Yet, I was not forgiving Paula of something she said. Truthfully, whatever she said, was none of my business in the first place. I'm still so sick over it.
I watched her on the Today's Show when Matt Lauer interviewed her last Thursday. I had already realized what a heel I had been when it aired. She said something that literally made my guts hurt. Through tears she uttered, "If anyone has never said anything they've regretted, I wish they would throw a stone at my head so hard it kills me." Wasn't I just doing that very thing? I owe Paula an apology and it's one she will never see, I'm sure. I judged her and for that I am so sorry. Jesus is very clear where He stands on judging others:
"31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Ephesians 4:31-32
"37 Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:37
I want to leave you with a song that changed my life. It is called Jesus, Friend of Sinners by Casting Crowns. You would think I wouldn't have acted so ugly if this song really did affect me like it did, but I am still a work in progress and I fail every day. I hope these words bless you as they have blessed me. If you are not on a computer, the video may not load. If it doesn't , I encourage you to YouTube it.
"She speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue." Proverbs 31:26